Month: June 2003

Some good music, good reading, an early night, a solid night’s sleep, a soak in the bath and a strong cup of coffee later, and my thinking is done. I know what I have to do. And I feel good about it. As someone said to me recently, you know when it is right. I just hope it isn’t too late.
But before I can do it, I need to tidy this place up (it’s a complete tip and Sarah’s coming round later), go to the bank and then head out for some lunch. Plus do some laundry.

More tunes in preparation for the radio grayblog refurb, including the legendary Aphrodisiacs’ track, This Is A Campaign, that Peel flogged to death around the New Year. And some classic XTC too.

Sleepy. I guess that is part of the problem – I’m a bit tired and run down, which means that my patience is less than normal, and my thoughts are less than clear. I think some rest and an early night will help. I’m not going into the office this weekend at all.

I’ve been over to Stansted House to visit the Garden Show there today. It’s pouring with rain, and I’m very glad that we’re not exhibiting there this year. I don’t think I could cope with a drenching like last year. Still, it looks like there are still plenty of visitors there, which is good. Jane, the organiser, deserves success as she puts so much hard work into it.
After visiting Stansted, I ran a few errands which involved driving along miles of lanes in the Downs, getting to see bits of Sussex that most people never look at. In spite of the low cloud and steady rain, it is beautiful, all lush and very green. For those familiar with Sussex geography, I travelled from Aldsworth to Forestside, on to West Marden, Walderton, Stoughton and East Marden, then from Chilgrove to West Dean along the back roads and finally through Goodwood to Westhampnett.
As I went, I had some jazz on the car stereo turned up loud, and I took the time to think. I need quite a bit of thinking time at the moment. I’m going to stay in this evening to do a bit more. One area of life is not working out the way I’d like at the moment, but I’m at a loss to know how to change it. But I’m not going to walk away from it, for sure. I just need to think my way through it and come to a positive, constructive and forward-looking conclusion.

Bum. Arse. Bugger. Fuck.
Beers tonight with Arron, Kearn, Kev, Paul C and Aris. Happy birthday Kearn.
But I don’t feel good. Distance is pants.

Good news for Brighton as Steve Coppell signs up for another season. Meanwhile, the reason for relegation is revealed.

Pants.

Happy birthday to Kearn. There is a drinking plan for this evening, apparently. I think I’ll head to either w2 or the Nags, safe in the knowledge that they’ll get there eventually, as I don’t really fancy the Chicago Pox place, as it will inevitably become known.
Kearn shares his birthday with Brian.

This morning, I’m feeling a bit .. well… deflated. Just once, I would really like things to go as planned, without people getting hurt or disappointed along the way. Just once.
Of course, it’s up to me to be strong and walk through all this with my chin up, and carry the people who are having real crises in life with me, and hope that there are better times for everyone on the other side. But some days it’s hard to do that.

I’ve just managed 411.68 at this.