It isn’t all in my

It isn’t all in my head. Why is it, as soon as I show even the faintest sign of optimism, something happens to really kick me in the teeth? Fuck.

Marcia points the world to

Marcia points the world to this. I’d just like to point out the following three facts:

  • in the last election, I spoilt my paper.
  • I have met the Queen. Well, kinda. She walked past me, and I talked to the Duke.
  • Ffion is actually not that unattractive. Unfortunately, she hangs around with a bald Yorkshireman. And she’s Welsh. (ducks)

Chichester Observer journalists are clearly

Chichester Observer journalists are clearly pants at maths:

Chichester’s busy East Street has come out top of the shops in a national survey.

A national survey has placed East Street … in the top ten per cent of the country’s shopping centres.
It has emerged in 67th place out of a total of 650 centres surveyed … moving up three places since last year.

OK, so I’m being picky. Sue me.