Category: very old blogging

mood update: I feel about the same as yesterday.
I had a fairly long and quite vivid dream last night – it didn’t help.

dumb things is interesting. one to watch, methinks.

Everyone wants to be asked questions (well, everyone being Meg, Tom and Vaughan – and Vaughan is only doing it half-heartedly). I have loads of questions at the moment, but I don’t think these people would have the answers.

in view of my ranting, moaning and self-pity for the last fortnight (god, is it only two weeks? not even that!), read what Meg wrote last night. I know exactly what she means.

TPL update: 25 points this week. Total now 600.

has anyone got any suggestions for shifting this really miserable mood I’m in? Things keep popping up to remind me – last night I was tidying and found Andrea’s Christmas present wish-list (most of which she got), scribbled on the back of an envelope. This morning I went to my pile of socks as I was getting dressed and pulled out Andrea’s knitted black gloves – she’ll have missed those last week. And there is still a very large pile of photos from our holidays together that I just can’t find the strength to deal with – so they sit in the middle of my living room floor.
And even though I know that going out with someone new now would be a bad idea, I can’t think of any way that I’m going to get to meet new people. The bar is off-limits (although I’ve been there twice now – but only in the knowledge that Kev wasn’t there), and I don’t want to go anywhere else and sit on my own. Not that I really want to go out with anyone new – what I really want is to get back together with Andrea, but that is as likely as my flying to the moon by flapping my arms.
I’m also aware that people will not put up with me feeling sorry for myself for ever – they’ve been really good so far.
OK – I’m going to go and do some work – “keep busy” they say – yeh, right.

God, I am really depressed this evening. I thought I’d been doing really well for the last couple of days – none of the sitting on the edge of the sofa sobbing uncontrollably. Well, I haven’t quite got back to that level of despair, but I’m not far off. Maybe it’s because I’ve just done a bit more tidying up in the flat, packing away and throwing away a few more memories. Whatever the reason, I am feeling very low right now, in spite of the two bits of good news I have today (one which I can’t talk about yet and may not be a piece of good news anyway, and the other being that my washing machine is ok after all – which is actually bad news in a way too because I have imposed my laundry on my mum and wasted thirty-odd quid on a part I didn’t need).
I really am VERY depressed. I miss Andrea like … oh, I don’t know, but I miss her. I’d do anything to hold her tonight.

hmm. There are things afoot that I can’t talk about here. But as Robyn put it when I told her, “one door closes and another opens – or rather, one door is slammed in your face.”
Really wish I had “someone” to share all this with. However, in her absence, I’ll just have to make do with thinking about it myself. Don’t worry, I’ll let you know as soon as things are definite one way or the other.

Someone I know has got a PC infected with the Hubris virus, as I’ve received it about 10 times (and have removed it on each occasion). If you get an e-mail from someone calling themselves Hahaha with a short story about Snow White, then that’s the one. Do not open the attachment – you will not be infected unless you do so. For more info, go to ZDNet. Of course, readers of this site have more sense than to open attachments from people called Hahaha.
Hmm. Girlfriend. Washing machine. Best mate. Virus. What next?

apology to Indesit: it seems the correct component was sent. I’m looking at my existing part and thinking that it may not have actually become damaged, merely moved from where it should be. So there may in fact be nothing wrong with my machine. hey-ho.