hmm. Beer tonight with Aris, Julie, Simon, DA, Paul C, Arron, Paul F, Sarah, Ian and Sacha.
Tonight, two people stressed me out.
The first stressed me out by being stressed, making that clear to everyone else, and then wandering off without making clear to that person’s closest friends that they were ok or otherwise. The friends (which I like to think includes myself) were left more than slightly worried and agitated, and totally powerless. Unanswered mobiles do not help. Advice: good friends are too valuable, as I know from experience this year, to mess around or stress out. They’ll stand by you and support you, but a brief word will keep them happy and help them support you in your troubles. Sometimes, friends try to help, but at times we don’t know what help to give. Sorry.
The second stressed me out by refusing to accept well-intentioned advice, particularly as that advice was a reflection of something that that person had decided when sober, but was clearly unable to carry through when the wrong side of ten beers. And, yes, I lost my rag, which didn’t help. Advice: you are not alone in dealing with your problems at the moment, but you may find that you are unless you accept that other people are trying to help you, not harm you or hold you back. Being self-destructive will have only one outcome – destruction.
It hurts so much to see the people you love (and trust and want to be around and care for) hurting themselves in ways that you are powerless to do anything about. Especially when those people have done so much for me in the not-too-distant past, and I feel a debt of gratitude towards them.
I’ve got my own troubles too – there are things on my mind that are bothering me, and I’m less than jolly as I sit here at my PC. But I’m too tired and stressed to really give them much consideration, and sometimes they seem fairly feeble compared to other people’s troubles.
I hope your Friday night was good. Mine was mostly good until things went wrong at the end of the evening. I’m sad that I missed seeing Brenda and Greg, who were out early in the evening, but departed before I got to Woodies. I’m sad that the support and help that I give to people is not always received or understood. I try my best, but I am only human.