As quite a few of

As quite a few of you know already, there have been things going on over the last week or two that I haven’t spoken about here. I was really optimistic that it would all work out perfectly – in fact, I haven’t felt more optimistic about anything in a very long time – but I found out yesterday that that was not going to be the case. As usual, I think I let my feelings run away with me – you’d think I’d learn really. But the feelings were honest, and I’d hate to lie to myself or anyone else about what is going on inside me.
Whatever happens, if I can sort my head and heart out, I think I have made a great new friend. An amazing, beautiful, funny, interesting, entertaining, patient, intelligent, understanding and caring friend. I would have loved for it to be something more, but it looks as though that’ll not be the case. But a new friend is something to be valued, and this one especially.
I feel a bit sad at the moment – I don’t think I can hide my disappointment, so please bear with me. But I know my friends will help me deal with this, my new friend especially.